This Bitter Cup

What happens when the life you’ve surrendered to God still doesn’t look the way everyone says it should?

In This Bitter Cup, Karimah Montshá returns to the story she began in Somebody’s Little Girl and confronts the questions that refused to disappear.

Faith. Sexuality. Calling. Desire. Church. Prison. Love. Marriage. Silence. Obedience. Identity.

Karimah loved God deeply, yet found herself wrestling with desires that remained, relationships that complicated everything, religious expectations that often spoke louder than compassion, and a calling that refused to leave her alone.

This is not a conversion story, nor is it a story built around easy answers. It is the story of a woman trying to discern God while everyone—including herself—had an opinion about what God must be saying.

Raw, reflective, spiritually searching, and at times painfully funny, This Bitter Cup explores the difference between surrender and self-erasure, church expectations and the voice of God, and what happens when faith and lived experience refuse to fit neatly into the same box.

For anyone who has ever loved God while carrying questions they were afraid to ask, This Bitter Cup is an invitation to look honestly at what has been poured into your own cup.